Bouncing Back

So it's been a week since the reading (and big thanks to everyone who came, by the way!), but since then, I haven't been myself lately. I think I overexerted myself the past month trying to get it off the ground, and now I'm left a little exhausted, a little lost, and to be honest, a little lonely.

I'm not sure what it is. It's not like I've been living as a hermit. My roommates have been the best, and I've been going out practically every week re-uniting with my college buds, the legendary SPFUN. By the way, if you want to see how much we've changed, here's a pic of most of SPFUN back when we were 1st years:


And this is SPFUN now:


Aren't we amazingly beautiful?

I received a lot of words of encouragement from my friends and family, as well as the attendees at the reading, but I still felt empty. I've still been frustrated on the production end. I was hoping to generate interest in a possible director or a producer, or a writer, basically someone I could share the work with. Someone who can inspire me and pick me up when I'm out. I try to get my mind back on the project, but the prospect of having to fight and claw to just get people somewhat interested in the script, let alone be willing to commit themselves to make this happen, is, well, intimidating. Thank God I can still pay the bills. I can only imagine how full-time artists get by.

I hate when I get like this, because then I start to feel guilty about feeling so helpless. People help people who help themselves. People are attracted to people who exude confidence. Sulking won't get anything done. Learn from your mistakes and move on.

So what face do you show? Do you show the happy one where everything is going as planned? The depressed face, hoping someone will give you sympathy? The frustrated one so people can see how passionate and important this project is to you? Or, as I've been doing the past week, the poker face, because you don't know how you should feel?

You prepare to get beat, expecting it, knowing that successful people fail all the time, that it's not a question of whether you get knocked down, but whether you get back up. But knowing the path and walking it are two different things. And just because you know the routine, it still takes a lot of guts and a lot of heart to bounce back.